Sleep Well
by SteeeeeeeveWatson
Summary: Allen talks too much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing cliches etc. but cliches are cute. Yullen, dark Kanda/Tykki. Implied lemon and possible pukey BL. Title used to be understanding. it is the same fic!. Please R
1. Chapter 1

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite cliched but cliches are cute. Also, Schink is not a word it is just me trying to use onomatopoeia without a suitable word. **_

_**Am I likely to own -man? I have only ever been able to draw stick people, and whilst most of the exorcists are skinny they are in fact not stick people. If I did own man Kanda would be gay and would have another irritating friend called me. Also he would be the main character. And Tykki wouldn't have the noah side, defeats the point but I like miner Tykki! --**__** long disclaimer.**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Allen woke up. He rubbed his eyes, looking around his dark room. There was a strange, steady noise coming from down the corridor.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

He sighed and got out of bed to investigate. His stomach growled. Okay, he told himself, go down to the kitchen, get some food then go and find the origin of this annoying noise.

__

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

Allen started back up the stairs, stomach now full and content once more. He came to the top of the stairs, and looked along the corridor. The noise seemed to be coming from Kanda's room. His eyes narrowed. He knew that the Japanese swordsman found it difficult to sleep unless he was completely exhausted; There had been many times when he had found the swordsman collapsed in the training room in the morning after a long midnight training session. But this was different. The training room was downstairs and Kanda didn't usually make strange noises whilst training, and he definitely didn't usually disturb Allen.

__

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

He burst into the older mans room, ready for a shouting match. Kanda didn't look up. Allen stopped. The Japanese man was sitting cross-legged on the bed, sharpening his already lethal katana. His eyes were red from lack of sleep, or … crying? Allen said nothing, watching the samurai's expressionless face.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schi... _

Kanda cut his finger. He stopped sharpening the katana and looked at his finger, the pain bringing him out of his reverie. The swordsman looked at his finger for a few minutes. Allen stayed silent, holding his breath. Then something strange happened. Allen rubbed his eyes, unsure if what he was seeing was real. The other man had broken down. He was now lying face-down on the bed, long hair spread out around his head, shoulders shaking, entire body wracked with uncontrollable sobs.

Allen moved towards the bed, not sure of what he should do. Kanda looked up. His face was pale, enhancing the dark circles under his eyes, his cheeks were wet with tears. "What the hell are you doing in my room _moyashi?" _He spat the last word out as though it had a foul taste. Allen started. "Umm… You woke me up sharpening Mugen, umm… I'll just umm…" he gestured towards the door. "Yeah, you just 'umm'" Kanda made quotation marks with his fingers and sighed exasperatedly, turning towards the wall.

**You like? Well if so review, otherwise no more. I demand 5 reviews asking me to continue. Mwahahahaha person controlling. Ahem. I mean please read and review. Please. But the five review rule still applies. **

**Many loves**

**xxxx **

**MIMB **


	2. Chapter 2

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite cliched but cliches are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!**_

_**Am I likely to own -man? I can't draw at all, and have a lot to do. If animes took five minutes to produce and I could draw I would have made millions by now. Also is Linali still in it? Yeah? Then it's not mine!! And Komui isn't featured in every episode? No? Then definitely not mine 3 3 **__**ß long disclaimer.**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Kanda woke up suddenly. He glanced out of the window, judging by the position of the moon it was one/two in the morning. He touched his cheek. It was wet. He sighed exasperatedly and wiped the tears from his eye. He wouldn't get back to sleep tonight. Not after that dream. This was the third night he'd had it now. Stupid rabbit, talking about .. him all the time. He hadn't had that dream since a month after he had joined the order. But now…

He shook his head, trying to make sense of what was running through his head. He needed to occupy his hands. He picked up mugen and the whetstone that was on his desk and began to sharpen the sword.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink `_

The steady, smooth sound of metal on stone soothed him, allowing him to drift off into a semi conscious state. His hand continued to move up the long blade, making it even sharper than it already was.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

The metal glinted in the dark room. The moonlight reflected in the blade. Kanda's hand continued to move. Up. Stop. Up. Stop.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

The order was silent. Kanda started. Someon was up. He shrugged and continued to sharpen the sword.

_Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink Schink _

Allen opened the door, but Kanda didn't notice, he just carried on in his dreamlike state. Suddenly a sharp pain brought him out of his reverie. He looked down. His finger was bleeding. He was a swordsman and he couldn't even sharpen his own sword without injuring himself. No wonder he hadn't been able to be there when he had needed him most. No wonder he had let the other man…

It all grew too much for the man. He couldn't take this anymore, years of hiding everything were finally catching up on him. He broke down, sobbing into his pillow. Mugen clattered to the floor. Kanda stayed like that for five minutes or so. But then… Someone was in his room he looked up. Shit. Moyashi was in there. What? Why was Moyashi in there? It was his room…

He looked up "What the hell are you doing here _moyashi_?"

_**Yay!! This is from Kanda's pov now. And it doesn't count as an update because it was the same time period. I still want five reviews!! Preferably with title suggestions. **_


	3. Chapter 3

Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite cliched but cliches are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!

Do I have to go into this? It isn't mine, it never will be and (sobs) its not fair!!! I want it dammit!!! Ahem. -man isn't mine . XD

In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.

_**Allen walked into the canteen. It was earlier than he usually got up, but he hadn't slept well. He had been up all night wondering, and he was loath to admit, worrying about Kanda. That stupid BaKanda. It was his fault Allen hadn't slept. Well he'd soon remedy that. He'd go and find Kanda as soon as he was done eating and…**_

"_**Are you going to order? I have better things to do than stand behind a daydreaming Moyashi all day." A low drawl disturbed him as he was psyching himself up to go and yell at Kanda. Kanda! He turned round to glare at the older man. Kanda raised an eyebrow "Yes?" he returned the glare, but with more contempt than Allen could ever have mustered. Allen shuffled his feet. "Umm about last night…"**_

"_**That doesn't concern you Allen." Kanda spoke quietly this time, seeming resigned to… something. Allen stopped. Had he called him Allen? He gaped at the swordsman, who glared back. "Hurry up and order Moyashi , **_**I'm hungry."**

**Allen was distracted all day. What was bugging Kanda? After what he'd seen last night, and the short exchange this morning he was beginning to seriously worry about the other man. He had decided to go and talk to Kanda, but watching the man train in a forest near Home he was becoming a little apprehensive. Kanda was very violent when he trained. But somehow… beautiful. The fluid movements made the man seem more like he was dancing than fighting. He watched the man move. The muscles on his bare chest rippled as he span and slashed in the dim twilight. Wait. What? He didn't think like that. That was… no. He didn't that's stupid. He couldn't have. No. He told himself. You were just making observations, for medical reasons, to make sure Kanda was ok physically. That was all.**

**Kanda stopped. He sheathed Mugen and put on his coat. Putting the sword in his belt he began to walk towards Allen. Allen panicked. He couldn't talk to Kanda now. Not after thinking… What he had just thought. He hid behind a tree. Kanda walked past him. "What are you doing Moyashi?" Kanda spoke without looking round. Allen froze. Kanda stopped and walked around the tree to him. He grabbed Allen's collar and lifted the boy up. "I said What. Are. You. Doing?" Allen scowled. "I was going to see if there was anything I could do to help, because you seem… upset." Kanda put the boy down uncharacteristically gently and turned away. "I said that doesn't concern you." he walked away in the direction of Home.**

**Allen couldn't sleep. He was now very confused. He sighed and got out of bed. Food usually helped him to sleep. He walked out of his room, in the direction of the kitchen. As he came back up the stairs he heard footsteps. He followed the sound and ended up outside Kanda's room. Again. He took a deep breath and opened the door.**

**Kanda was pacing up and down the room, eyes half open, muttering under his breath. Allen watched him for a while, but the Japanese man didn't look up. Allen watched for another few minutes, before realising that Kanda wasn't really awake. He tentatively took the other man by the hand and lead him over to the bed. He sat on the bed next to the comatose Kanda, watching the man carefully. A tear escaped Kanda's half closed eye. Allen watched it trace a wet path down the Japanese mans cheek, before it fell into his lap. Allen felt a sharp pain in his chest… sympathy? He sighed and left the room, walking quietly. He paused at the door and spoke softly. "Night Kanda. Sleep well." **

_**3 Aaaaw they are so cute!! I got five reviews XD but no title suggestions. Please suggest titles people, otherwise Allen gets it. (Joking!! I can't kill him yet… But maybe later Kays. Thts not a spoiler I don't know yet either!!) **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite cliched but cliches are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!**_

_**Do I have to go into this? It isn't mine. Kanda's brother is. He's entirely mine to do what I want with Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahaha. Ahem. Yes. -man isn't mine**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Kanda was pissed off. Allen kept asking him what was wrong, as if he really expected to be told. That baka moyashi. Like Kanda would tell him anything, anyway, it was too horrible. He didn't want the younger boy to hear that. It was too… intimate, too revealing, and anyway. Allen didn't care. It was his fault anyway, talking so loudly, and for so long about… Tykki. Kanda shuddered involuntarily as he thought the name, but it was improving. There was atime when he couldn't even think it. But back to Allen. He hated him. Always pretending, always lying to everyone, trying to be everyone's friend. Kanda didn't understand how the boy did it. If he had to try to be everybody's friend he would die from exhaustion. Yet Allen kept going. Kept his mask on. Kept hiding. Though… He was hiding too, wasn't he. His mask wasn't as kind, but he still wore one. He sighed. This kind of thinking wasn't going to help. He got up and left the meditation room, heading for the forest.

Whe he got there he removed his coat and shirt, the cold air making him more awake. Reminding him that he was still alive. He unsheathed Mugen and began to shadow spar.

Swish

_Pain._

Kanda continued to spin and slash, trying to ignore the memories.

_Darkness, lights flashing, that girl, Rhode? A dark room. His brother crying out in his sleep. _

Kanda moved faster, attempting to block out the pictures, now appearing even more vivid, more real.

_The pain. Everyday. It hurt so much. Too much for his thirteen year old body to stand, yet he didn't die. His brothers screams. A girl, stroking his hair as he lay bleeding. Telling him it was ok. He could sleep. And then… Dreams. Nightmares, so bad tey seemed more real than the ever more hazy world. Nightmares he couldn't wake up from, because when he was awake it was just as bad._

Kanda banged his head against a tree. "Stop it, stop it, stop it." he muttered through clenched teeth. "I don't need this." he heard Allen approaching. He picked up Mugen and continued his sparring, slashing violently at nothing in particular.

_Tykki's tongue in his mouth. The feel of his hand on his thigh. That laugh, so mirthful, but sinister. His brothers cries in agony as the older man raped him. His own cries as Tykki moved inside him. And the blood. So much blood. It was surprising how much blood two prepubescent boys could lose without dying. And then…_

_Darkness. Then light. A forest clearing. The glint of silver. Light reflecting off mugen. Red blood on white snow. His brothers rasping breaths. Then. Silence. Nothing but his own slow breathing. _

Kanda gave up. He needed something to keep his mind off things. He walked back to Home. Stopping to query allen on his way. He was juts on his way to the library to find something meaningless to lose himself in when he heard kombi's voice over the intercom. "kanda, report to my office. I have a mission for you and Allen."

_**Kyaaaaaaaaaa I have a sister in law!! (not really though, only intenets. Loves to allen is mine XD)**_

_**Also kanda pov high five -taii. Loves for you also.**_

_**Please R and R, but no title suggestions I know what it's called now.**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite cliched but cliches are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!**_

_**Man is all mine. Mwahahahahahahahahaha I win. XD. Wait what? It's not? Oh well, back to writing fanfics then. Sob.**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Allen sat across from Kanda on the train. He was trying to find something to say to break the awkward silence, but every time he spoke Kanda glared at him, and made some non-committal response. They were on their way to a village in Spain, where they would meet up with Tiedoll, find the innocence, then escort the general back Home. Needless to say Kanda was not happy. He tried to avoid his Gensui wherever possible, but now he was being forced to spend at least three days with the man, and he was not happy. Mugen lay across his lap, his fingers drumming on the hilt. Allen watched, entranced by the long slender fingers dance on the stained wood.

The train stopped. Allen jerked awake. Kanda had already left the compartment. Allen ran to catch up with the older exorcist, stepping off the train he saw Kanda standing with an older, eccentric looking man. Tiedoll. As he walked closer he caught snippets of their conversation. Kanda's irritable voice; "I told you. I'm fine." The Japanese exorcist's scowl deepen as the mans concern heightened. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want you getting depressed again. I hate seeing my children hurting!" Kanda glared at the man. "I told you I'm fine. And you are not my Father." Tiedoll sighed, "I'm as good as. Now, let's go. Ah!" Tiedoll smiled at Allen. "You must be Allen. I apologise for Kanda, he's just been a little out of sorts recently is all." Allen smiled wryly. A little out of sorts! The Samurai was acting more like he had gone insane! Kanda glared at them from further ahead. "Shishou, shut up." His glare intensified as he looked at them for a moment longer, before turning back around and heading in the direction of the exit.

By the time they reached the Inn they were staying at it was late at night. They headed straight up to the room to dump their bags. They opened the door. There were two beds in the room. Allen ran in and put his bag on one of the beds. "Yu-chan has to sleep on the floor!!" For a moment he sounded just like his red-haired friend. Tiedoll smiled. "I'm quite happy to sleep on the floor if you do want a bed Kanda." Kanda simply shook his head, before walking over to the corner furthest from the window and putting down his bag, muttering something about idiot bean sprouts not knowing their place.

Tiedoll smiled kindly. "Shall we go eat?" Allen nodded enthusiastically, bounding towards the door. Kanda shook his head again. "I'll stay here. I don't need to watch Allen eat." The Japanese man watched as the others left before opening his bag. He took out a fresh top, glancing momentarily at a picture he had revealed. Two boys. Completely identical in every way. Smiling, laughing about some stupid joke. He sighed. He had been so different then. It was only six years, but he was so much older now. So much more bitter. He shook his head. Things happen. Cope. He took out his hair slide, allowing his scalp to breath.

Allen laughed as Tiedoll told him yet another story of something ridiculous Daisya had done years ago. He finally put down his knife and fork, and they headed back up to the room. Kanda was sitting on one of the beds, his wet hair loose, hanging down his back. He grunted in acknowledgement when they came in, before moving over to the corner by his bag. Allen yawned. "I'm going to bed now, guys." Tiedoll nodded in agreement, catching the yawn from Allen "Me too. Kanda, try and get some sleep tonight ok?" Kanda nodded and lay down on his coat.

Allen woke up. It was still dark. He looked around the room. In the bed next to him Tiedoll was snoring gently, in one corner Kanda lay, pale skin almost pearlescent in the moonlight. The young man was shivering. Allens gut wrenched. Why was he bothered? Kanda had been through far worse than a little cold, but still, watching the man shake was making his heart ache. He sighed, giving up on common sense. He stood up, grabbing the bed cover as he did. He walked silently across the room before laying the blanket over the sleeping man. Kanda continued to shiver. He sighed, before lying down on the floor beside the man. Kanda shifted in his sleep so he was facing Allen, and subconsciously took the younger exorcist in his arms. Allen tensed for a minute, before relaxing into the older mans arms. He placed his own arms around the Japanese swords-mans waist and moulded his body to fit with the other mans. He watched Kanda sleep for a while. His almost dry hair smelt faintly of soap. The man seemed so much younger when he wasn't frowning. His delicate features were calm, and he was almost… beautiful? Allen blinked in surprise, at these rogue thoughts but stopped halfway, his eyes remaining shut. He tried to open them for a minute, but then… he was asleep.

Tiedoll awoke to see the two young exorcists locked in each others embrace, both sleeping deeply. He smiled, before quietly leaving the room and going down stairs.

_**This one's longer than usual, and a little later as well, but still. -Taii you didn't high five back!! No loves for you this time!**_

_**As usual love to all who read this. Please R and R. Btw this may end sadly. If you want me to do two endings tell me and I will.**_

_**Also:-**_

_**KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA So cute XD **_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite clichéd but clichés are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!**_

_**Man is clearly mine. That is why I am posting this on a website, rather than making it an episode. Come on people, must I write this!?**_

_**-Man isn't mine.**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Kanda woke up. He was facing Allen. He smiled slightly. The younger boys hair was curling softly around his face. His own dark locks were entwined with Allen's white ones. He smirked. Black and white. That pretty much summed up their relationship. Complete opposites, at least on the outside. Always hiding, always fighting, but at the same time always knowing there was something there. Something deeper. Something that they both tried to deny, but neither could. Kanda was overwhelmed with an urge to kiss the star shaped scar above the boys eye. He stopped himself. That was stupid. There could never be anything between them. It just wouldn't work, they were too different. They would just…

Wait.

WHAT THE HELL!? Why was Allen lying next to him. He jumped up, grabbing Mugen, which was lying next to him, within reach at all times. He walked quickly over to the other side of the room. He sat on the bed Allen was _supposed_ to have slept in. Allen stirred. He looked up at Kanda, smiling sleepily "Morning Kanda." Kanda scowled, polishing his already pristine sword. Allen looked confused. "What's up? Did I… Oh." The boy looked away. Kanda blushed. Why did Allen have to be so damned cute?! He turned round, hiding the blush rising on his cheeks. Allen muttered something. Kanda's scowl deepened. "What?" Allen looked at the older man. "I said that I just came over because you were cold and I didn't know what to do!" Kanda's blush deepened, and he glared at the other exorcist. "You could have just left me. I've been through worse." Allen scowled. "I did something nice. You should thank me and never mention it again!"

"Believe me moyashi I'm not going to mention it to anyone, but now Tiedoll's seen us, and he'll probably never let it go!"

Allen jumped up, activating his innocence. "So! It isn't that bad!" He ran at Kanda, who lazily raised mugen to block Allen's attack. He was about to activate mugen when Tiedoll walked in, he smiled to himself before placing a hand on Kanda's arm. "Please don't wreck the hotel. We'll have to pay if you do."

An hour later they were walking around the village. Neither Allen nor Kanda had said a word since their argument that morning. Tiedoll sighed. "I'm going to go and speak to the locals and see if they can tell me anything about where the innocence could be, could you two try not to kill each other." Tiedoll walked off and the two exorcists sat on the grass. Allen watched Tiedoll leave before turning to Kanda. "See. He hasn't said anything." Kanda sighed. "No, but he'll be planning our f**king wedding in his head. He's like that." Allen paused, looking up at Kanda, before saying tentatively. "Kanda?" Kanda looked round at him and grunted in acknowledgement. "Umm… do you? I mean, could we…" He trailed off. Kanda raised an eyebrow. "What?" Allen scowled and looked away. "I just mean, do you think anything could ever happen? Between us I mean?" Kanda stopped, shocked. "What do you mean?" He said, standing up and checking the surroundings fro anyone around. Allen walked over to him. "I think there's… something there." Kanda sighed and sat down again. Allen sat down next to him. Kanda's cheeks became a delicate pink and he looked away. "I… I don't know. Maybe. But we can't… can we?" Allen made to reply, but was cut off by Tiedoll's return. Kanda scowled and stood up. Allen followed suit. "Did you find anything?" Tiedoll held up a small bag, with something glowing inside. Kanda began walking off in the direction of the station. Tiedoll smiled exasperatedly before gesturing to Allen. "Come on, let's go."

_**Ooooooh suspense!!! Though I know what happens, and it's fairly predictable so you probably do too!!**_

_**Anyways. Please R and R**_

_**Many loves **_

_**xxx **_

_**Mimb**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite clichéd but clichés are cute. Also, yes this is the same time as chapter 1, but a different perspective. I need titles please make suggestions!!**_

_**Man isn't mine. Am too tired to be witty today XD!!**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

They were on the train again. Allen sneaked a glance at Kanda. The older exorcist was sleeping, his long hair loose after a stressful morning. Allen smirked to himself. Kanda was funny sometimes. All that stress over a snapped hair bobble!! He looked over to Tiedoll who was also sleeping. This confused Allen, who could never sleep on a moving train, and he knew Kanda had slept well. His cheeks reddened. He had said a lot of things today that he hadn't meant to. He watched Kanda, praying that the other exorcist would say nothing when they got back Home.

Kanda jerked awake, hands tightening around the Katana that lay in his lap. After a moment his hand relaxed and he glared at Allen. "What do you want moyashi." Allen looked down. Why was Kanda so to the point? "I was just thinking about what you said earlier." He met the other mans eye. Kanda glanced at Tiedoll. "Not now Allen." His voice softened and Allen nodded. Though to him there was no risk, Tiedoll seemed fairly deeply a… he jumped as Tiedoll sat up next to him, brushing himself down. "So," He smiled. "What are you boys talking about?" Kanda scowled. "You were awake." Tiedoll looked at Kanda, an obviously fake expression of confusion across his face. "What do you mean? Do you not trust me!?" Kanda raised an eyebrow. The older man began to weep. "Waaaah! You don't trust me, my own son!!" Kanda simply looked at the crying general, disdain marring his features. "I'm not your son. And I know you." Tiedoll righted himself, grinning. "Ok, I heard, an d I saw you this morning!" He hugged Kanda, who stiffened. "You're so cute!" Kanda drew mugen. "Say anything and I will…" Tiedoll pushed the sword away. "You shouldn't threaten generals. You'll get in trouble. And don't worry I won't tell anyone." Kanda relaxed, going back to his seat. The three men were silent for a few moments, before Tiedoll spoke again. "So, are you two… " Allen looked at Kanda, were they? "Ummm…" Kanda sighed, exasperatedly. "I don't know Moyashi. Are we?" Allen scowled. "How should I know. Do you want to?" Kanda glared at him. "Stop being non-committal. Do _you_ want to?" Allen turned away, blushing. "Maybe, if you want to. Bakanda." Kanda glared out of the window. "Yeah, I guess. But you tell noone." He gared at Allen and Tiedoll in turn. Tiedoll clapped his hands. "Hurray!! We should have a party!!" Kanda raised an eyebrow. "How is that not telling anyone?" Tiedoll sighed. "Fine."

_**Sorry this is a short one. That seemed a good end point. Haha, argument about whether they're together. They argue too much.**_

_**Allen: No we don't!**_

_**Kanda: And if we do it's because moyashi's being stupid. **_

_**Allen: I'm never stupid. And don't call me moyashi.**_

_**Kanda: *Che* I'll call you what I want. (Here he would say bitch, but he is trying not to be ooc. But for taii and my other friend he does say it, and the che is flouncey XD!!) **_

_**Allen: No you won't!! *activates innocence***_

_**Kanda: *draws mugen* I will!!**_

_**Mimb: … sigh.**_

_**Please R and R despite my lunacy.**_

_**Many loves **_

_**xxx **_

_**Mimb**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**Allen talks to much about someone Kanda would rather not hear about. Ensuing emotional crisis and opening up of Kanda etc. Quite clichéd but clichés are cute. **_

_**Man isn't mine. Am too tired to be witty today XD!!**_

_**In this fic there will be lots of lovely BL, implied lemon, Yullen and some dark Yukki (didn't know what to call KandaXTykki and this seemed funny) Also possibly some Linali hate.**_

Kanda looked at Allen. The boy was looking at him expectantly. Kanda scowled. "I know I said I'd tell you. But I'm not like you. I don't want the whole world to know exactly what I'm feeling at any time, so this isn't easy ok." Allen looked hurt. "I don't tell everyone everything," he said indignantly. He sat down on the bed beside Kanda, glancing out of the small cracked window before putting his hand on the Japanese mans shoulder. "If it's too hard we can leave it…" Kanda shrugged his hand off. "It's fine. I'm not a child Moyashi." Allen scowled again. "It's not childish to have emotions Kanda… " Kanda scoffed. "Whatever, now shut up if you want me to tell you anything! " Allen sighed exasperated. He looked at the older man, who was once more facing the wall, his long dark hair hanging loose behind him. It was silent for a few minutes. Allen was about to say something when Kanda started to talk. His voice was monotonous, and from what Allen could see, his eyes were closed, his face devoid of any emotion.

"It was six years ago now. We were twelve."

Allen made to interject but Kanda raised his hand, making him be silent once more. " I'm one of twins, moyashi. I forgot you didn't know that." He turned to glare at Allen before facing the wall once more, to continue his monologue.

"After our mother died we travelled with our Uncle for a while, but when we were ten he died, so it was just us. We were walking towards a village, looking for work, when something happened. I'm not sure what. We woke up in this… room. It was empty. We were each in separate corners. I woke up first, it was weird, there were no windows, or doors, so there was no way we could get in. Mugen was missing, and my brothers violin. It was cold in there."

Kanda paused, shivering at some memory, which couldn't just be the cold.. He shook his head slightly before continuing.

"Then Tykki came in, through Rhodes door. She was with him, but he made her leave. He said 'There are some things little girls shouldn't see.' Kanda shuddered again. "We were in that room for a long time. I don't know how long. It was… It was awful. I don't remember a lot of it. But…" Kanda stopped, struggling to say something. Allen moved towards him, putting his and on the other mans shoulder once more. This time Kanda didn't shrug him off. He swallowed before continuing.

"Tykki raped us. I… I had to watch him hurt my brother. We didn't know we were exorcists then. He just kept hurting us. Then Rhode would come, she would pretend to comfort us, then put us in dreams that seemed more like reality, but that were worse. It must have been over a month. He only let us go because he thought we were dead. He left us in the forest we were in when he had taken us. He left Mugen and my brothers violin next to us. Tiedoll found me, next to my brothers corpse. The snow was red…" Kanda trailed off. Allen put his arms around the other mans waist. Kanda turned around, still in Allen s arms. Tears streamed down Allens cheeks. Kanda looked at him quizzically. "What's wrong moyashi?" he snapped. Allen looked up at Kanda. The Japanese mans cheeks were cheeked with dry tears, but he didn't seem to notice. "I just…" He clung to the older man. "It's just so awful! I can't believe you had to go through that! And noone knows! They think you're just being mean, but you're in so much pain!!" Kanda shrugged Allen off. "Don't be stupid moyashi. I hardly think about it, it's just that it was recently my birthday, so I was thinking about him."

Allen looked up, his sobbing subsided. "Do you miss him?"

Kanda turned to face the wall again before answering. "Yes. I think about him everyday, but I mostly just ignore it…" His shoulders sagged "It's just too much some days. And I…" He clenched his fists, suddenly angry. "I hate Tykki so much! When I think about him it makes me want to kill someone!"

Kanda sighed, calming down. Allen replaced his arms around the other mans waist. Kanda moved in towards Allens body, putting his head on the boys shoulder. They stayed like that for a while, Kanda's shoulders heaving as he cried long held-back tears.

After a while Kanda fell silent. Allen glanced at his face. He was asleep, suddenly so much younger and more innocent, his cheeks streaked with tears. Allen shifted slightly, checking how deeply asleep Kanda was. The boy didn't stir. Allen lifted him off his shoulder and gently laid him down. His brushed a strand of hair out of the other boys face before kissing him chastely on the forehead.

He lay down next to Kanda, once more holding the man close to him. He was surprised that the usually strong, silent man was hiding so much pain. He knew it was a façade, but he could never have known the depth of pain the other man was feeling. He sighed. Kanda was too stubborn. If he had only said something earlier…

_**!This badly written! I might rewrite it, but that's it for now I'm afraid!**_

_**xxx Love you all !damn u -taii having conversations with me without me even knowing!!!! Much love to all reviewers. If you review I'll reply and it'll be all lovely. Please do. Also I'm thinking of writing an enzai fanfic but am not sure - advice will be appreciated!!**_


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